Saturday, September 04, 2010

Hot Joke

Mother found a condom in daughter's cupboard.

She went straight to her n asked: What is this?

Girl: तो आप क्या चाहती हैं, मैं इस उमर में मा बन जाउ?

Thursday, July 01, 2010

MURDER OF ENGLISH

The Leave Applications; )

· Infosys , Bangalore : An employee applied for leave as follows:

'Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife , please sanction me one-week leave.'

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· This is from Oracle Bangalore: >From an employee who was performing the 'mundan' ceremony of his 10 year old son:
'as I want to shave my son's head , please leave me for two days...'
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· Another gem from CDAC. Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
'as I am marrying my daughter , please grant a week's leave..'
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· From H.A.L. Administration Dept:
'As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it , please grant me 10 days leave..'
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· Another employee applied for half day leave as follows:
'Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return , please grant me half day casual leave'
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· An incident of a leave letter:
'I am suffering from fever , please declare one-day holiday.'
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· A leave letter to the headmaster:
'As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today'
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· Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
'As my headache is paining , please grant me leave for the day..'
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· One Covering note:
'I am enclosed herewith...'
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· Another one:
'Dear Sir: with reference to the above , please refer to my below...'
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· Actual letter written for application of leave:
'My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave'.

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· Letter writing:-
'I am well here and hope you are also in the same well.'
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· A candidate's job application:
'This has reference to your advertisement calling for a ' Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience , I am applying for the post.

Thursday, May 06, 2010

LAUGH LAUGH n LAUGH

Teacher: 'What is your name?'
Student: 'Mera naam Suraj Prakash hai.'
Teacher: 'When I ask a question in English, answer it in English.'
Student: 'My name is Sunlight.




Teacher: 'What is your name?'.
Student: 'My name is Beautiful Red Underwear'
Teacher: 'What kind of a name is this? Don't joke tell me the right name'
Student: 'My name is Sunderlal Chadda."




Teacher: What happened in 1869?
Student: Gandhiji was born.
Teacher: What happened in 1873?
Student: Gandhiji was four years old.




Teacher: What is the full form of maths?
Student: Mentally affected teachers harassing students




Teacher: Now children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him then what virtue would I be showing?
Student: BROTHERLY LOVE




Teacher: Because of Gandhiji's hard work what do we get on 15th August?
Student: A holiday





Teacher: 'Can anyone give me an example of Coincidence? '
Johnny: 'Sir, my mother and father got married on the same day same time.'




Teacher: How old is ur father.
Sunny: As old as I am.
Teacher: How is it possible?
Sunny: He became father only after I was born. (1st Rank)


Teacher: There is a frog, Ship is sinking, potatoes cost Rs3/kg...Then, what is my age?
Student: 32 yrs.
Teacher: How do you know?
Student: Well, my sister is 16 yrs old and she is half mad.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

नसबंदी की टीम ...

नसबंदी की टीम दोबारा गांव में देखकर एक बुढा आदमी बोला – इन लोंगों नें कनेक्‍शन तो पहलें ही काट दिया था अब क्‍या हैंण्‍डसेट भी ले जायेंगे?

Friday, March 12, 2010

THE POWER OF WOMEN

A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue. . . . .

Doctor: "What happened?"

Woman:" Doctor, I don't know what to do Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp...."

Doctor:"I have a real good medicine against that: When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of green tea and start swirling it in your mouth. Don't drink it, just swirl it around and around".

.........2 weeks later she comes back to the doctor and looks reborn and fresh again.

Woman:" Doc, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk I gargled repeatedly with green tea and he never touched me."

Doctor:" You see how keeping your mouth shut is such a good idea !!!"

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